ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime




SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.




GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.




HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.




LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.




PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.




DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.




HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.




SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT.

JerSooz Says...Sometimes Life hands You Lemons so why not make Lemonade

The Secret to Success is to Learn to Laugh at Yourself...Be Kind and Understanding to Others

Then comes the Rule Put God #1

Then Family and Friends #2

Then Comes the Less Fortunate #3

#3 is Important...This Rule also includes Kids who Must be Taught there is No Hate...Jealousy or Prejudice unless Taught...Old Folks and Seniors who have Lived a Full Life that May Now Need Our Assistence...To Those that May be Alcoholics or Drug Addicts because don't have the Mental Facilities to Help Themselves

Plus Kids and also Adults who come from a Violent Society who has Taught them Only Violence as a Viable Alternative...May We have the Strength to Help Them to see the Positive Aspect and the Wealth of Knowledge that there is a Positive Alternative...Life is Precious Treat Others as You Yourself want to be Treated

These 3 Rules if Follow them will Truly Find Your Own Life Problems can then be seen Not as Problems but Merely as Life's Challenges...Whereby being Busy Helping Others...Our Own Worries are Less Mundane...Less of Issues and More Understanding as to Needs of Others